Bloody Stupid Heart!

Sigh. Where to begin today?

Hmm... I can chose to complain about an odd fellow I know or I could talk about a surprising event that involves someone of my past~. LOL I wonder which one would be more interesting~ x3. Well, it's doesn't take brain science to know that the majority of you (my readers) are more curious about the past someone, so I suppose I'll talk about them~ :P

Today is Wednesday (no shit xD thats obvious~), and I usually tutor this second-year school girl with Choco-chan. However, today Choco-chan didn't come to the tutoring session because she's presenting her Spanish project tomorrow, and needed to prepare. Thus, I had to walk home alone ;___; bad things always happen when I walk home by myself. I don't know why. I guess it's just apart of the many curses placed upon me xP (ex. of other curse would be that I am not able to write any kind of short story). An example of how bad things  happen when I walk home by myself is that I always trip on those little cracks in the sidewalks. And like 20 (er-more like 2~3) of those people who give out flyer pop out of no where. I don't take the flyer from them because I am not interested in the flyer, so I always feel rude ^ ^;;. Thus, I count meeting flyer people as a bad event xD. Anyways, today something ..not so bad, but still bad-ish happened on my way home today.
On my way home, I always pass by this park. And that park has fun memories :'D. There was this guy I used to like (I'll call him Fungus xD). Every time I passed by the park, I'd see him playing handball (a game where you just whack a ball on a wall xD). Even though I don't like him anymore, I still have the habit of checking to see if he's there. He doesn't play so much (cuz he's like busy or something :P). So as I was passing by, I saw him today!! I was so shocked because he hasn't been there since last school year ended (meaning I haven't seen him since last June). A-a-and he... he cut off his hair TT^TT. I shall remind you that I have a hair fetish, and Fungus (xD) had really nice hair.... well his hair was actually normal, but it complimented his face very well, so he was very cute looking >w<. But now he's like ..idk how to explain...well to put it simply, he's ugly XD.

For some reason though, when I saw him my bloody, stupid heart (lol english accent xD) was pounding inside my chest. It wouldn't stop Dx. I wanted to talk to him :3 or at least say "Hi". I act pretty gutsy sometimes, but to be honest I'm a gutless chicken xP. I just kind of stood there and stared at him in awe xD. But then he started walking towards my direction. LOL no not because he saw me or something wonderful like that~. It's because the handball bounced over in my direction. After that I started to speed-walk away xD I got scaredd~. I kept staring back at him as I kept walking. He noticed me, but didn't recognize me (we were like er- 15~20 ft away?). Gosh, what a douche >3< can't believe he doesn't remember my face. Hmm...or maybe he did. Because when he looked up at me he kept staring, but I turned away. He did too, but kept looking back a few times. LOL sigh. Things could have turned out a lot cuter (perhaps a bit more romantic?) if I had the courage to say something as simple as "Hi~! :D" and wave my arms about in the air like a girl who's trying to act normal would.

But no~ I kept walking home xD. sigh. Even when I got a safe-ish distance away, my heart still wouldn't stop its god damn pounding. LOL when my heart rate speeds up, and I get embarrassed, I have this habit of taking my fist and gently pat my chest with it at the same rate as my heart beat. I dunno why~. Perhaps I hope my heart won't feel the need to pound so hard if my hand was :P.

Argh, but I hate that I feel this way. I feel so stupid =3=.

LOL but it don't matter because he's not the one I love anymore~. (well I never really loved him before~. it was more a deep liking :P)

So yea~ that was my terrible run in with a person from the past.
...how come after re-reading this, I find what I'm talking about unimportant? xD;; I make it sound like such a major issue, but nothing happened ^ ^;; . sigh. answer: I'm an idiot :P