The Lucky Ducky I Am!

A couple of my friends from middle school and I got together today to hang out for the holiday break. The beautiful thing is that everyone seems to haven't change in the slightest. Well, X-chan seems to have gotten a little bit "too cool for us". Haha, but all is well xD. We traded gifts, ate froyo, and had a tone of fun. What I found to be quite fun though was that I was like a whole two inches taller than everyone :'D. LOL. Sadly not because I miraculously grew over night, but because I wore the new boots my daddy got me for Christmas >w< !! Kyaaa~ I love them. They're ah-maz-ing~!  I mean the heel is like a whole friggin' 3 inches high (and I have declared them to be little devils T~T), but I still love 'em!

http://www.6pm.com/michael-antonio-malone-taupe?zfcTest=mat%3A1

I wore them out today, and was having a ton of fun. How I felt on the way home though was a whole other story though! My toes felt the slow torture. Gradually, my walking pace became slower to make up for the pain and I was totally being left behind. //boohu. When I finally got the chance to stop, I switched out my boots for a pair of nice comfortable sneakers that I kept in my bag (in case of emergency foot pain and whatnot xP). I placed my boots into a red plastic bag, and tied it to the side of my bag. Being the "smart" one I am, I double knotted it, so it doesn't fall. However, when I got back home....... my boots were missing >___>. FUU** !! Of course, being the crazy bastard that I am, I decided that I wasn't going to just say "Oh fucking well. That's too bad." No. Like hell I would say that xP. Instead, I forced my dad to get into his car and help me find my boots even though it was raining/snowing/hailing. Not to mention it was dark and we were both in our pajamas. My dad is nice though. He was like "I doubt you'll find it! It's not very likely" also insert some phrases of "You're so stupid!" and "I taught you better!" Haha, but that's not what makes him nice... xD;;. LOL. It's that despite thinking I'm a complete idiot, he tossed on his coat and gave me the chance to find it. Of course, throughout the entire time, he was whining like a baby and complaining about how he'd rather buy another pair than go through with the work of finding it XDD. We drove around. My face glued to the window, trying to look for any sign of my boots. All I could think of was "look for the red plastic bag. red plastic bag." I tried to convince my dad (and myself) that although it was dark, the redness of the bag and the small help of the street lights will be enough to spot it. We couldn't find it though! I was so frustrated. All my dad could do was say "It's okay. The price dropped more, so now it's only $15!" (lol, oh dad xD). And as I was about to give up hope, at the very last moment, in my perifpheral vision, I saw it. A small lump of red on the edge of the sidewalk. I shouted in excitement as a glimmer of hope sprung within me as I hopped out of my car (after it stopped ofc) and dashed toward it. I bent down to pick it up, lifted the flaps of the bag, and in the dim light of the night, .... it ended up being full of garbage.



LOL Just kidding! Inside were my boots!! TTwTT. You wouldn't believe how happy I was!! My boots are now in my possession once again. Soaked, but still beautiful ;w;. Haha, my dad couldn't believe that I acutually found it. He wouldn't stop laughing xD.

i'm just really annoyed right now

The rain had finally stopped. For awhile there, I was beginning to worry. The rain came down with no end. It was as if the sky's heart was broken, and the tears wouldn't stop! It sent it's anger down upon the Earth in the form of hurricane Sandy. The storm crashed about wildly and wrecked homes like a crazed bull on a rampage. The terror has yet to end too! The power lines are down, and people are panicking about.

But somehow, I've made it out alright so far. Perhaps a few trees had tipped over here and there, incapable of holding its ground any longer and feeling the need to hug the Earth one last time. The streets are flooded, and the wind is chilled. But I'm alright, alive and well. Haven't left the house once as I listened to the storm beckon me away with its constant banging of my window. It's strong winds howled. My sister flinching at every sound. If Sandy had stayed any longer, I'm sure it would've driven our sanity to the point of desertion!

Luckily, the power is intact, and school is cancelled until Monday. I hadn't taken this opportunity to blog a bit more 'till now though. I've been working on homework, reading manga, and listening to the sexy voices of Kat-Tun. Oh, sweet sweet Kazuya ♥. What a joy it was  ^u^.

I've been feeling kind of aimless though. I've reached one of those points in life where I find myself lost .___. like idk what's the point to what I'm doing anymore.... No, wait, that's not the right way to explain it. I'm lost in the sense that I know my destination, but I don't know which path to take to get there. Of course, I want a future where I'll be rich and happy 8D.... but I'm told that I need high grades and good schooling. Yet, I'm also told that such things aren't necessarily needed. Then, there's my dad blabbering on about how I should learn java, and a whole bunch of other computer stuff. And I'm just sitting here wishing I could become a manga editor ;w; (I've been reading too much Bakuman lately xD).

LOL I'm not serious about the manga editor thing. Sigh. I'm thinking about becoming a psychologist or a write or an engineer. I need a passion though! To be honest, I don't have a passion. I'm not super indulged into reading, or photography, or computers, or music, or art, or anything really!

My dad constantly tells me "Learn Java, photoshop, illustrator, Ubutu, windows, programming." It's just constant computers, computers, computers. Plus, I also have like ecosystems, and Hinduism, Confucianism, and dirty dozen grammar skills just bouncing off the walls of my mind all the time.

It's come to the point that I'm so overwhelmed that I'm calm! You know what I mean? It's like if the water is hot enough, it'll feel cold. Have you ever felt that? Turned the water so hot that when you put your hand under, it'll feel cold for a few seconds. ...If you haven't, I'm not saying you should. LOL the afteraffects hurt like hell XD.

Anyways, what I'm saying here is that I don't know where to go. I've liked my schedule of sleep, school, homework, eat, sleep, and then repeat. With the next few days off, I've had time to do more. Except, all I find myself doing is homework (my social studies teacher posts homework ahead of time, so I'm doing that). I feel like I should be reading non-fiction (which I'm really weak in) or learning Java or doing something.

My life isn't just grades, but I don't know what else to do besides focus on that! That's why I feel like I'm going to fail in life because all I can do is get good grades. Grades are important, but they don't mean everything. If that's all I'm good at though, then I consider myself a failure no matter how high the grades are. TT______________TT.

I need a passion... but I can't find it. I hear that's what makes people successful. They can often turn their passion into money, and it would be fun too since they're doing what they love. But how can I live that kind of dream if I don't have a passion?? UGH ! This whole thing is just pissing me off =___=.

My dad is dead set in his belief that Java will be my forever passion or some crap like that, but I really find no interest in it at all! I think it's the fact that he pushes me so hard that I don't want to do it. I have this feeling that I'm just going to utterly fail at it, and disappoint him. Passion or not, that won't be fun! So I've settled on just not doing it at all... which isn't a very good solution either.


I dont know. I'm just frustrated, and writing it all out hasn't really helped me come to a solution. That upsets me :V