Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Not Doing So Well :(

My brain is just kinda malfunction at the moment xD. And I feel kind of ...pissed off in side... well maybe not exactly pissed off. . . just. . . frustrated? moody? grumpy? annoyed as hell? in a crappy mood? lol it seems like I'm always in a crappy mood lately~.
One of the main causes that my brain is totally malfunctioning is that Science has started to hate on me. I just knew that my favorite subject would do this to me :T damn with my luck, this kind of thing happens all the time. Sigh~ so what I mean by Science is starting to hate on me is that I'm not doing well in science class xP. During class, I'll semi-understand things. Homework will confuse the crap out of me though. I'll ask for help from friends, but I still don't really understand it. And when I do think I kind of get it, I turn out to be flat wrong. I'm learning the part of science where it's you get it or you don't kind of thing; no in between. It's so bad that I actually got a 50-something on my science quiz OTL (14 questions. got 6 wrong). I feel so damn frustrated that I kinda want to cry. But obviously I wont :P. To solve this problem though, I'm ditching my friends' help and asking my dad instead. He understands me well, and knows how to explain things in a way that I'll understand. I'm a very visual learner, so he uses things like pictures or videos or objects. It really helps. I'm glad I have a dad I can go to for help. But still, why is it that everyone in my class can understand it, and I can't?! That's what pisses me off the most. Like why the hell am I so stupid? TT^TT sigh~ this sucks! I hate being stupid xP. It's such an icky thing to be.
You know what also adds to my moody-ness? Gleek-kun :V. If you're reading this Gleek-kun, I'm sorry but it's true. I hate that you tell me that you feel sorry for me. Like wtf, man? I don't need your pity. I don't like it when people feel bad for me. It's like..saying "I feel sorry for you" ain't gonna do anything, but make me feel crappy as hell. I mean it's nice that you understand that I'm in a bad situation, but do you really have to state it? I know Gleek-kun didn't intentionally make me feel worse on purpose (or maybe he did :V).  Sigh~ it still pisses me off. Too many people have told me that they feel sorry for me. That makes me sad. :(
I didn't do too well on my math test either. TT^TT why are my best subjects turning on me?! I got like an 80-something on that. Which also adds to the stress. I got the points minus off for stupid mistakes again. Why the hell do I make stupid mistakes?! Where does my mind go when I am taking tests!? Why can't it just stay focus on the test and prevent me from making stupid mistakes? Why am I so stupid? Crap, I'm in a pissy mood, and I realize I'm ranting on about it. Sigh~ just deal with my complaints until I improve I guess. I don't get why my grades are going downhill so fast. It makes me sad. I don't like being sad. I don't know how to handle being sad.This isn't even pure sadness. It's stupid school sadness. I guess I just fail at life...but I don't want to except that. I can't except that! I have to try harder...yet I'm sitting here spending- what half an hour? - writing this instead of studying. Sigh~ I'm a sad fail person and a waste of air :V what a bother I am.
I should really go buy myself some sour gummy worms and root beer to cheer myself up lol xD.

Erm- well~ on the bright side of life, I finally got around to organizing my binder ^ ^. I'm really happy because that. You want to know why? It's a rather stupid reason to be honest xD. You know how you can slide stuff into your binder front cover (and back cover)? Well~ I slid a picture of Setsuna, and a bunch of hearts into my binder cover thing~. The picture of Setsuna is one that I traced, and it looks all professional~. I'm quite proud of it. (I traced the picture like a year ago xD). And it was truthfully just three hearts xD not really considered a "bunch". But no one in my class or at my work place agrees that Setsuna is cute D: they all say he's ugly. Sigh~ people are so mean T^T. Out of the entire thing, everyone said they liked the color of the hearts :T. It was a dark blue color. I'll post a pic of my binder cover later~. But despite all the insults, I'm still really happy with my Setsuna picture :D It makes me happy because I get to see Setsuna's face everyday, the whole day~ <333.

5 comments:

  1. D:
    Fifty something? D: YOU? the ultra-nerd? :o
    You should do some studying ~
    Get off the computer for a while ^^
    Just... forget everything and go study haha ^^
    I did well on my exams <3 (:
    You'll do fine if you are only thinking about that subject while studying ~ :)

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  2. his its the gleek or ydoc
    i didn't mean to make u feel bad but maybe u just have too much stress on you. the thing u said about using visual things to explain stuff is totally tru you said u would bring in stuffed animals to explain the thing about trains. any ways im sorry i made u feel bad.

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  3. @banana: nerds can fail too ya know :V
    like i just failed one of my pop quizzes that had only 3 questions <_<
    emiko is stressed k? there are some things in our lives that you wont understand
    @emiko: ...u seriously thinking about telling gleek about trains? O__O

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  4. To Banana-kun. . .

    lol okay~ I'll study harder :P
    and congrats on doing well on your exam :D I knew you would ^ ^~

    To Gleek-kun. . .

    Haha I knew you didn't mean to make me feel bad~ :3. And lolol your example of me being a visual learner doesn't have anything to do w/ visual learning. It means I teach through visual techniques :P.

    To Ai-chan. . .

    :'D *is happy you defended her*
    I guess I am a bit stressed. That reason seems to make the most sense out of all the ones I can think of xD.
    and haha I didn't tell him what it meant. Luka-chan did. And I ended up not having to bring stuff animals to show him xDD.

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  5. @emiko: :x
    i just knew that SHE would

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